3 He was despised and rejected—Christ loves me so much that He went through all of this just for me. Yes, His death was horrible and beyond anything I can even fathom. But I often forget, he endured pain his entire life. It wasn't just one day. It was an entire lifetime. I go through small trials and get down. I get sick for a few months and think my life is ending. I think God doesn't like me because I accidentally get a terrible terrible haircut and get my eyebrow skin waxed off in the same month... But, I mean, really??
a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief.
I turned my back on him and looked the other way.
He was despised, and I did not care.4 Yet it was my weaknesses he carried;
7 He was oppressed and treated harshly,
it was my sorrows that weighed him down.
And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God,
a punishment for his own sins!
5 But he was pierced for my rebellion,
crushed for my sins.
He was beaten so I could be whole.
He was whipped so I could be healed.
6 I, like sheep, have strayed away.
I have left God’s paths to follow my own.
Yet the Lord laid on him
the sins of us all.
yet he never said a word.
He was led like a lamb to the slaughter.
8 Unjustly condemned,
he was led away.
No one cared that he died without descendants,
that his life was cut short in midstream.
11 When he sees all that is accomplished by his anguish,
he will be satisfied.
And because of his experience,
my righteous servant will make it possible
for many to be counted righteous,
for he will bear all their sins.
God's own perfect Son went through these same things. Well, okay, He probably didn't have to get his eyebrows waxed every single month. But, His trials were much worse, to say the least.
Why in the world should I think that I wouldn't go through any trials if Christ, God's own son, the only perfect being to ever live, suffered more than I can imagine? Like, if I think that little bit of wax ripping off my skin is painful, how much worse would a big leather strip with sharp objects in it ripping off my back skin be? And that wouldn't even be for my benefit (thinner eyebrows).
So many times, I look at things totally wrong. I know I don't understand what is going on-- what His plan is. He's teaching me to just trust Him. But it's so hard. It's so hard to see the big picture... When I'm focusing on myself, looking at things in the complete wrong light. When, sometimes, I just don't want to get out of bed. When bad things keep happening to me, one after the other. When I know where I need to be, but I don't know how to get there.
Then I realize, the thing wrong with all of my thinking is the I's. It's not about me. It's about Christ and me. He has it all under control. I just have to trust Him. I can't worry about it simply because I can do nothing to help the situation. I want to stay in bed, but Christ can give me something to look forward to each day. Bad things happen to me, but Christ went through much worse and He is there for me to rely on and for me to talk to about it. I know where I need to be, and Christ will get me there in His perfect timing.
My prayer is that I will be reminded of all of this throughout my week at Recruitment. That I will remember why I'm living. I'm here not for me or my sorority or my reputation, but for Him and His glory. And the awesome thing about it is, I don't have to do it on my own. He is there holding my hand. And when I go through hard days, I can go curl up in His lap because He, of all people, well, maybe people isn't the best word there, but He does understand.
