I'm a Vegetable.

I'm a Vegetable.

The past 30 hours:

Awaken at 9, off to class, straight to lunch, head to the library for 3 hours, then to finance office hours for 1.5 hours, bus ride back to the apartment at 5:30, hurry to turn in homework by 6, drive to Val's to study, actually study, bake cookies for Crompton and Devin, come home at 10:00, go to Sonic for caffeine, back to Val's till 11:30 without my sonic diet dr. pepper (it's still in my room), back to the apartment to study until 2am, sleep 4 hours, wake up at 6am, 2 cups of coffee, study for a test at 8am, another 9am class, lunch at 10:30 with Mol, tutor a girl in finance, class until 1:10 and HOME by 1:30.

So my point? I've been lying in bed for over an hour and haven't slept. I drank too much coffee. I can't do anything really-- no homework, don't want to get out of bed, can't form a complete sentence out loud; I'm just a vegetable, jacked up on caffeine. It's a lovely feeling, really.

I have my small group at 5:00 and then my other small group at 7:00, and then The Cross and 9:00 but I'm thinking I'm going to be a vegetable by then, not jacked up on caffeine anymore, so The Cross may not happen this lovely rainy Wednesday evening.

By The Way: I thought that I knew a guy on the bus today, a guy who I met last night at Devin and Crompton's apartment. So I see him on the bus as I'm walking on, about to slide my bus card, and I cut my eyes over, gave him a cheesy smile and raised my eyebrows, like I knew him or something and was about to go talk to him (although it was a weird thing to do, no matter if I knew him or not), but keep in mind, this is at 1:10 after this long day. So, no reaction from dude. I proceed to get my card out after dropping all my wet stuff in the bus doorway, and then look at him again failing to give up on the first time he obviously didn't recognize me, and this time I squint my eyes, smirk, sit in front of him, then take a deep breath like I'm about to say something, but then I finally recognize the look of complete confusion and shock on the guy's face. Then I just turn around, and sit there in front of him for the rest of the 15 minute bus ride, never looking back, and ignoring him get off.

Why do I do these things? Why, oh why, do I make eyes at complete strangers on buses when I have to sit there with them (it's worse than an elevator)? I can almost guarantee you that I will see dude again this week. And he will definitely not forget that little wordless encounter.

I can already picture it, tomorrow:
7:30am: Mel enters bus.
7:31am: Mel just sees a seat and sits in it, not really noticing the bus buddy in the seat directly next to it.
7:31:30: Mel hits the bus buddy with her back pack. Oh wait, when she turns to apologize, she realizes, is that him? She doesn't apologize.
7:32am: Mel is feeling awkward, next to him. Her mind leaves her; she can't think of a single thing to say. She thinks that he thinks that she meant to sit there next to him. Obviously, he thinks she is a total creeper, first the eyes, then the next day sitting right next to him.
7:33am: Mel decides to try to talk to him. But all she gets out, because she thinks back to this post, she says, "Hey, I'm a vegetable!... [awkward pause] .... I mean, I'm Melissa."

Yes, this will happen tomorrow.

Definition of Productivity

"I think I'm going to try to be productive with my time tonight, so I'm going to get in the shower!"

I didn't really think about it, but Gav mentioned that my statement was very odd. After thinking it through, I guess it is a little weird, but ya know, college days are lazy days, and I don't really mind it. Showers are a big deal for me, especially if they last longer than 5 minutes.

Now I'm all clean and ready for bed. The big decision now is, to dry the hair or to let it be. The rain outside is causing me to lean toward the latter option. Maybe this won't be that productive of a night.

What a morning!

Woke up this Sunday morning, got ready for church, and packed up my clothes so that I could head home after church for a few nights. Gavin had a friend over and so I started talking. Next thing I knew it was 11:10 and church had started at 11:00. I knew it would take me 20 minutes to get to church, and it was raining. I decided to go ahead and leave, just be a little (30 minutes) late. I lugged my overnight bag, backpack, lunch box, and purse all out the door and headed to the car until I realized that there was a steady drizzle and that I'd forgotten my umbrella so I came back.

And I decided it wasn't worth going to hear half of the message, that I probably wouldn't understand it. So here I sit, in my church clothes, listening to Christian praise music over the noise of the dishwasher, with my packed bags surrounding me on the floor. What a morning!

I'm so looking forward to home. I'm not going to lie, home is my favorite place ever.

Never alone
I'll be in every beat of your heart
When you face the unknown
Wherever you fly
This isn't goodbye
My love will follow you stay with you
Baby you're never alone
-Lady Antebellum and Jim Brickman

How Not to Figure Out What to Major In

I've been browsing the net, thinking about my future. Didn't come up with many plans, but I found some interesting information for those of you who don't know what to major in and who aren't yet JUNIORS in college. It's too late for me to go back now.


According to CNCB, the college degrees most in demand in 2009 are as follows, along with my thoughts on each:

1. Accounting. Good thing I just changed my major so that it is no longer accounting. That would have meant I probably would have had a job when I graduated. Sorry Dad.

2. Mechanical Engineering. Makes me sick thinking about any kind of engineering. I don't think I even know what engineering really is.

3. Electrical Engineering. My luck, I'd probably get electrocuted.

4. Computer Science. Computers. I don't get mad often. Unless it's at computers. I get angry at computers. I can officially state that I get more upset at computers than I do at people.

5. Business Administration/Management. Hey, I'm a Business major. Too bad I hate all of my business classes I'm in now. If, and only if, I did business as a career, I'm pretty sure the only part I'd enjoy would be buying new, really cute business clothes.

6. Economics/ Finance. My Finance class is killing me. Today we played a game in class and the teacher through a tennis ball and whoever caught it picked a friend nearby to answer the question. I knew NONE of the answers and I was so afraid I was going to get called on, I felt sick to my stomach and almost got up and left. But it would have made a scene because the other 150 students would have known- Oh, she's too chicken to play the game. To say the least, I don't want to go back.

7. Information Sciences and Systems. I'm also in an Information Systems class. It took me 2 days almost straight to even install the software on my computer. It's not looking so good.

8. Computer Engineering. Computers + Engineering. Definitely not.

9. Management Information Systems. Isn't this a repeat of number 7? Must be realllly popular.

10. Marketing/ Marketing Management. I've always wondered what marketing majors actually do.



So, my future plans are still slim. As far as my major, human resources, is concerned, well... in my HR class yesterday, the teacher was talking about how companies are needing less and less human resources people as the years go on (might not be the best sign for me, or my parents at that). But, honestly, I am not really planning on working in HR anyways since I really don't know what Human Resources people actually do.

I'm thinking Christian counseling at the moment. It sounds really exciting and interesting, but who knows what it's actually like, because I'm pretty sure you can't just shadow a counselor when they're working.

I have approximately 613 days to figure out what to do after I graduate. That sounds like a long time to me. Plenty of time, right?

These are a few of my Favorite Things

I've moved, unpacked, started school, and cooking on my own again. I've discovered a few things for the first time and some things that I just forgot from last year, and here is my list of my top ten favorite things in my life now that the semester has begun.

1.) The fact that I'm finally all moved in. I love decorating and so actually having it all come together and barely spending money on it just made my whole month! We used stuff from our houses and Gav's family's fabric from their fabric store.


2.) The fact that we don't care that we have empty picture frames all over the apartment makes me happy.

We have one picture in one frame and all the rest are this strange man and woman looking at a book. I think the man looks like a Chan.

Here we have a missing lamp shade along with a missing picture in the frame.

And the missing pictures in the frig magnets.

Last year I accidentally left empty picture frames in my living room all year long and didn't realize they were still empty until I was moving out.

3.) My third favorite thing doesn't sound very nice, but it's the truth. I'm so excited that the swine flu is going around and I haven't gotten it. I'm not excited that poor roomies Gnat and Beal have had to suffer through the fever and cough, but I feel like this is the first time in about a year that I haven't gotten sick when someone else is sick. Maybe my immune system is actually returning! It's a miracle in itself.

4.) Asian Toasted Sesame salad dressing. I could probably do a commercial for this stuff just because I'm such a fan. I now love eating salads for dinner. Or snack actually. Or snack and dinner. And we ran out of cereal, so I may even have a salad for breakfast tomorrow :) . I eat the salad purely for the dressing.

5.) The fact that I truly believe that it's okay to wear my favorite comfy clothes every single day to class. I realized that I automatically go back to the same clothes every year when school starts. For some reason, there's no looking cute for class in college for me. My complete wardrobe is as follows:



Pretty simple. I've got my assorted colored t-shirts, Nike shorts, and podiatrist-recommended tennis shoes that I wear day in and day out.

6.) Classical music and black out blinds. When the neighbors get loud, I can use these two things to sleep, but really I love that I have a need for these two things now. I have lively neighbors. But really, that's good. It's nice to be able to go right outside my door and talk to some lively people. And when I get tired I can just come on in, blast my classical music, and usually fall asleep.

7.)Sugarland. It Happens. Everyday America. The two songs make me happy every time I hear them.

8.) Outdoor adirondack chairs. I love sitting outside. Especially around here, I can stay entertained for hours just watching people. And this weather has been perfect.


9.) A Perfect Mess. By Lisa Harper. The book somewhat defines my life. Each chapter focuses on a different Psalm, and they are all incredible. Just the book I've been needing.


10.) My first indoor closet. I don't have a closet at home. And I definitely have never been able to walk in a closet that is my own. It's revolutionary. But, problem is-- I'm going to have to get more clothes to fill up my closet. Not sure how Dad will feel about that problem.


So there they are, my top ten favorites. It's the little things in life that can be my favorite. Truthfully, I get more excited about the salad dressing than the big closet. The empty picture frames make a great conversation starter, and wearing workout clothes today got me some Adidas promotion job because I looked 'fit'... It was totally the tennis shoes though. I know I didn't look fit exactly. And, after the guy offered me the job, I tripped while standing.

Anyways, take a look around at the little things in life and discover the little quirky things that you really appreciate. There are probably more things that you'd think.

Let's Put Things into Perspective

This is something that I wrote a few months ago and that I just remembered about and I just wanted to post it tonight for some reason. Isaiah 53 hit me hard one day and here, I copied it but changed the we's to I's because that's just how I like it.

3 He was despised and rejected—
a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief.
I turned my back on him and looked the other way.
He was despised, and I did not care.

⁴ Yet it was my weaknesses he carried;
it was my sorrows that weighed him down.
And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God,
a punishment for his own sins!
⁵ But he was pierced for my rebellion,
crushed for my sins.
He was beaten so I could be whole.
He was whipped so I could be healed.
⁶ I, like sheep, have strayed away.
I have left God’s paths to follow my own.
Yet the Lord laid on him
the sins of us all.

⁷ He was oppressed and treated harshly,
yet he never said a word.
He was led like a lamb to the slaughter.

⁸ Unjustly condemned,
he was led away.
No one cared that he died without descendants,
that his life was cut short in midstream.
¹¹ When he sees all that is accomplished by his anguish,
he will be satisfied.
And because of his experience,
my righteous servant will make it possible
for many to be counted righteous,
for he will bear all their sins.

Christ loves me so much that He went through all of this just for me. Yes, His death was horrible and beyond anything I can even fathom. But I often forget, he endured pain his entire life. It wasn't just one day. It was an entire lifetime. I go through small trials and get down. I get sick for a few months and think my life is ending. I think God doesn't like me because I accidentally get a terrible terrible haircut and get my eyebrow skin waxed off in the same month... But, I mean, really??

God's own perfect Son went through these same things. Well, okay, He probably didn't have to get his eyebrows waxed every single month. But, His trials were much worse, to say the least.

Why in the world should I think that I wouldn't go through any trials if Christ, God's own son, the only perfect being to ever live, suffered more than I can imagine? Like, if I think that little bit of wax ripping off my skin is painful, how much worse would a big leather strip with sharp objects in it ripping off my back skin be? And that wouldn't even be for my benefit (thinner eyebrows). 

So many times, I look at things totally wrong. I know I don't understand what is going on-- what His plan is. He's teaching me to just trust Him. But it's so hard. It's so hard to see the big picture... When I'm focusing on myself, looking at things in the complete wrong light. When, sometimes, I just don't want to get out of bed. When bad things keep happening to me, one after the other. When I know where I need to be, but I don't know how to get there.

Then I realize, the thing wrong with all of my thinking is the I's. It's not about me. It's about Christ and me. He has it all under control. I just have to trust Him. I can't worry about it simply because I can do nothing to help the situation. I want to stay in bed, but Christ can give me something to look forward to each day. Bad things happen to me, but Christ went through much worse and He is there for me to rely on and for me to talk to about it. I know where I need to be, and Christ will get me there in His perfect timing.

My prayer is that I will be reminded of all of this throughout my week at Recruitment. That I will remember why I'm living. I'm here not for me or my sorority or my reputation, but for Him and His glory. And the awesome thing about it is, I don't have to do it on my own. He is there holding my hand. And when I go through hard days, I can go curl up in His lap because He, of all people, well, maybe people isn't the best word there, but He does understand.

The Lady with Purple Hair does make a Difference

Time to go back to school! Well, actually, rush! I'm headed out in a couple of hours. What an incredible summer it has been. I've never in my life had a summer that passed so quickly.

My cousins and sisters--Merd, Mars, Lars, Lone-- and I made a list at the beginning of the summer of random things that we were going to do before the summer was over so that we would never run out of ideas of things to do. The summer went by in such a flash that we didn't even finish our list of 15 things.

Here are some of the pictures:

We jumped into the river downtown. Mom and dad and my aunts and uncles said we couldn't go to Fripp Island, our family vacation, if we jumped in because they thought that was so rebellious. But we evaluated the danger and decided we were willing to take the risk, and it was well worth it. The river was calmer than the 3 foot pond in my backyard and we didn't even get sick from the water. All that worrying on mom's part for nothing.

We dyed our hair blue as one of the events. Mine never really showed up too well and then everyone else's ended up fading to gray. Now they look like they have a gray streak of hair in their pony tails.

Having a fun school year is going to be hard to beat the fun that I had this summer. But, I really think I can do it if I put my mind to it. I'll only be in college once, and I have to remember to have fun and not concentrate too much on my classes, right? Grades, they don't really matter in the long run.

I'm just going to take millions of vitamins and try to sleep regularly (though that might be hard living with Gav and Gnat because we'll be having so much fun all the time) and hopefully I'll stay healthy! Getting through a month without a virus will be a feat for me! And I will be thankful for any bit healthiness that the Lord gives me!

If I've learned anything in this past year, it's sympathy for people who aren't well. I really feel for people who are sick because of my sickness. I know how it is to lay.sit.rollover.lay.sit. in bed for days. And now I can see that God will use that experience in my life to glorify Him through me relating to other sick people.

And secondly, I've learned acceptance of all types of people and their spiritual gifts. The other day, I found myself defending the curbside preacher who was yelling at the top of his lungs. I used to think those guys were just horrible, turning people away from Christ because they were so annoying. But now I believe that the Lord does use all types of people in all types of ways--even those guys. I mean, Merd was saved by the lady with purple hair and fake eyelashes on TV. Do you know which one I'm talking about? Who would have thought that lady would actually impact someone's life?

So anyways, I think that now I have a more open mind after my year-long bumpy ride, but I am hoping that the Lord will use me to glorify him through experiencing those tough things and that this year will be easy. That's probably not really the right thing that I should be praying, but it's true. All I want is a fun, easy year. In my new apartment. With my awesome roommates and friends next door. With my family safe at home. And that I will be able to stay up in Collegetown having fun over most weekends!

So here's to a great upcoming school year for me and for all of you!

(It's sparkling grape juice, of course!)